About a week ago I realized that Jonathan was being a lot more cranky. And I was being a lot more frustrated with his crankiness. Not a good situation. So I sat myself down and did some thinking about why we were in said situation.
I think that what happened is this: Jonathan got a lot more mobile, and a lot more self-entertaining, very quickly. And as I realized that I could put him down and let him be on his own, I did. The result, I think, is that he didn't feel nearly as secure. Yes, he can play on the floor with his toys while I do other things. And he does and he should. But that kind of alone time needs to be limited...he's only 9 months old, after all! I think that I just sort of lost track of the fact that he's still a baby who needs me. And as I'm consciously choosing to remember that and act accordingly, he's being much less fussy.
It feels good to be a proactive mom. I'm spending more time playing with him on the floor - he sits in my lap and plays with toys. He's still getting lots of new experience and stimulation, but he's feeling safe and happy because he knows I'm right there with him. And we sit on the couch and cuddle and read books in the morning. And in the afternoon I try to anticipate his more fussy time by carrying him in the sling. Yes, I don't get much done around the house after 3pm...but Jonathan isn't crying, either. We're both happier at the end of the day, so I think it's a great trade-off!
Isn't it neat to see a thought-out parenting choice actually work the way you hope it will work? :)
2 comments:
That's such an important thing around here, too. Whenever Isaiah starts acting out, picking on his brother and sister, it's a sure sign that he needs more cuddles and one on one time with mom.
Ah, it is wonderful when that sort of thing works out, isn't it. Stepping back and trying to look at a situation from different angles is such an important tool for parents, but it is also so difficult at times because we are so caught up in the constant demands that parenting brings!
I'm finding with Gregory that I need to remember to strike a balance between putting him in the bassinet or bouncy seat so that I can get something done and keeping him in the sling or in arms because that's where he's happiest, most well-adjusted, and really, where he belongs (especially at this age!). With Emma I never really had the option of putting her down, so I'm finding myself doing it a bit too much with Gregory because I can.
That trying to get something done urge is really such a pain sometimes. I keep reminding myself that I'm a Mom first, and a housekeeper/household manager/whatever after that!
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