Thursday, February 28, 2008

To nurse or not to nurse...that is the question

And a sticky question it is, this time around.

When Jonathan was 13 months old, I got pregnant with Thomas. About 8 weeks into the pregnancy, nursing became excruciating. I had been so sure that I wanted to nurse throughout the pregnancy (heck, I was even thinking about tandem nursing!) but the pain was making me seriously resent my son. So we weaned. And he didn't care. In fact, I don't think he even noticed.

When Thomas was 11 months old, I got pregnant with Wee One. About 8 weeks into the pregnancy, nursing became excruciating. (Sound familiar?) :) But Thomas, unlike Jonathan, is not, not NOT NOT NOT!!! ready to wean. Not even close. Nursing is still a big part of his life - a comfort when he gets hurt, calming when he is fussy but not quite tired enough to sleep, cuddle time with Mommy that isn't interrupted by his big brother. He doesn't want to give that up, and I don't blame him.

So we're still nursing. Right now I'm kind of in a holding pattern - sort of an "I'll nurse this time, and then decide what to do" plan. I'm not sure that is really a plan. :) I am working towards no more night nursings - although when sleep is as dear as it is in early pregnancy, sometimes it is hard to stick to the theory knowing that he'd be asleep in ten minutes if I just nursed him...

There is a large part of me that thinks that he really does still need this, and so I ought to just bear it for his sake. Then there is that other part that jumps up and down and yells "but, but, but, OUCH!!"

I guess I'll nurse him this time and then decide what to do.


Elena said...

That was so hard for me when I was pregnant with September, and my OB said I had to wean.

Before I started weaning, the twins were already drinking from sippy cups very well, and so I just assumed I'd wean straight to the sippy cup.

But then when I tried bottle feeding, it went much more smoothly. Even though they really could feed drink for themselves just fine(and often did) I needed to replace nursing them with snuggly bottle-feeding sessions. After I switched from sippy cups to bottles, it was almost a little insulting how easy it went...

crossfamily said...

Providence was 10 months when I got pregnant with Rosemary and because she was pregnant I continued to Nurse until 2 months before I was due (she weaned herself). I felt that I had no choice since she could't drink milk and was sooo tiny. It was painful during early pregnancy but became much better after the first trimester.
My OB also told me I had to wean because I was losing weight but I refused and Rosemary turned out just fine.
Its your call but it does get better (or did for me).

Amber said...

I know what you mean! I was sure I would be nursing Gregory through the whole pregnancy and before I was pregnant I was perfectly content with that and the idea of tandem nursing... then when I was pregnant I was not so thrilled with the idea of tandem nursing and OK with nursing while pregnant... and then at about 10 weeks it got uncomfortable and sometimes painful and I was not so ok with nursing during pregnancy and *really* didn't want to tandem nurse... and then at about 16 weeks it got extremely, jump up and down and screech, painful to nurse and I thought "AAH!! whatever am I going to do, this little guy is going to kill me! But he enjoys nursing before he naps and goes to sleep so much, how can I ever tell him no and stop?" and then a week or so later he. just. stopped. One night (after I had inadvertently screeched rather loudly after a nap nursing attempt in the afternoon) he turned to me a said "no nurse". I *ahem* didn't argue. He fell asleep saying "no nurse, no nurse" happily and quietly to himself and that was it. He said "no nurse" a few more times over the next week and then it hasn't come up again.

The downside? He no longer naps unless we go somewhere in the car in the afternoon (sigh) but it was an ending I really did not expect in the least.

The moral of the story? Um, I'm not sure, other than things may turn out differently than you expect. :-)