Friday, June 11, 2010

How many does it take to change a light bulb...?

Religious denominational version! This is shamelessly copied from Gem of the Ocean. I have no idea where she got it, but it is wonderful. Thanks to Betsy for sharing it with me!

How various religions cope with changing light bulbs:

* Charismatics: Only one. Hands already in the air.
* Pentecostals: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
* Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
* Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.
* Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.
* Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.
* Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.
* Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
* Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.
* Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
* Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.
* Amish: What's a light bulb?


Amy said...

:-)Glad I get a drink!

Katie Jones said...

Orthodox: Change? Who wants to change anything?

Emily (Laundry and Lullabies) said...

Ha! Katie, that's a great addition!