It is quite likely that we're going to have another baby. By quite likely, I mean that we're not yet out of the "danger zone" for miscarriage, but things are going well enough that I've allowed myself to start imagining tiny fingers and toes and little scrunched up faces. Isn't that a nice image? :)
I'm taking bets: boy or girl? If you're right and its a girl, you win the opportunity to give us cute pink clothing. If you're right and its a boy, you win the opportunity to give us lots of diapers. :)
Being pregnant, while incredibly exciting, also certainly has its downsides. For me, right now, one of those downsides is that I'm supposed to be "resting as much as possible" (what in the world does that mean, exactly?) in order to make sure I continue to carry this baby. Another is that I'm sick as a dog for most of the day. Combine the two and it is very easy to think that something just isn't quite fair in the universe! :)
Well, so I knew that already. :)
I hate not being busy, and this enforced rest is really starting to get on my nerves. Have you ever just felt like you had to run or hit something? Only neither is an option and crying doesn't help? It's sort of like that. You can only read so many books, watch so many movies, and do so much needlework before you go crazy. You can only watch your husband go to work and do the chores and take care of the toddler and make dinner - all the things you are supposed to be doing before you go nuts.
It doesn't really help to tell myself that right now, I'm not supposed to be doing them. I still feel that they are my responsibility, and that I'm falling down on the job.
In theory, I have another four weeks of this kind of life. When I think about that, I cry. So I'm trying to think only about today, and then today, and then today.
Thanks be to God for my wonderful friends and church family. People have been coming in to help take care of Jonathan twice a day so that I have space to rest like I'm supposed to. I don't like letting people come to my not-so-clean house and do my dirty dishes, but I'm grateful that they love me enough to do it.
As far as being sick...well, it is a good sign. Sick generally equals healthy pregnancy. So I keep thanking God that I'm sick, and refusing to kiss my husband when he's just eaten chicken. Or beef. Or turkey. Or potato salad. Or...you get the idea. ;)
Would you please pray for us in this time? As difficult as it is for me, I think it is harder for Jonathan and Gabe. Jonathan doesn't understand why Mommy isn't much of a playmate right now. Gabe is trying to be himself and me, which is rather a daunting task, don't you think? ;) And please pray for our baby. We'd really like to meet her.