Friday, February 29, 2008

Nursing follow-up

Amber, you may have it right. :) Since posting yesterday, here is what has happened:

Bedtime nursing: Thomas bites me before he's hardly started. I respond with a loud "no no!" and he freaks out and wails. He refuses to nurse anymore, but goes to bed (surprisingly) without much fuss.

Early morning nursing: Thomas bites me right at the beginning. I respond "no!" and he cries and refuses to nurse. He goes back to sleep in his crib for another 30 minutes or so.

Morning nap nursing: Again, Thomas bites me before really starting (I wonder - perhaps I'm not letting down quickly enough and he's frustrated?) then cries when I say "no". He takes his nap without nursing and without fussing.

Afternoon nap: He falls asleep in the car and transfers!!

At this point, since he has missed FOUR nursing sessions in a row, I decide to try nursing him when he wakes up. He nurses happily on one side, and then cheerfully pushes me away.

Well then.

I am starting to wonder if my milk supply is just drying up. I didn't expect that, because I thought that nursing as frequently as we were would prevent losing my supply. On the other hand, maybe this is my body's way of protecting the pregnancy - at 10 weeks along I've not gained any weight, which is unusual for me. Maybe nursing and gestating is a bit too much multi-tasking?

Thursday, February 28, 2008


Jonathan on personal hygiene and health:
"I put grass in my hair so it would be all healthy.”

To nurse or not to nurse...that is the question

And a sticky question it is, this time around.

When Jonathan was 13 months old, I got pregnant with Thomas. About 8 weeks into the pregnancy, nursing became excruciating. I had been so sure that I wanted to nurse throughout the pregnancy (heck, I was even thinking about tandem nursing!) but the pain was making me seriously resent my son. So we weaned. And he didn't care. In fact, I don't think he even noticed.

When Thomas was 11 months old, I got pregnant with Wee One. About 8 weeks into the pregnancy, nursing became excruciating. (Sound familiar?) :) But Thomas, unlike Jonathan, is not, not NOT NOT NOT!!! ready to wean. Not even close. Nursing is still a big part of his life - a comfort when he gets hurt, calming when he is fussy but not quite tired enough to sleep, cuddle time with Mommy that isn't interrupted by his big brother. He doesn't want to give that up, and I don't blame him.

So we're still nursing. Right now I'm kind of in a holding pattern - sort of an "I'll nurse this time, and then decide what to do" plan. I'm not sure that is really a plan. :) I am working towards no more night nursings - although when sleep is as dear as it is in early pregnancy, sometimes it is hard to stick to the theory knowing that he'd be asleep in ten minutes if I just nursed him...

There is a large part of me that thinks that he really does still need this, and so I ought to just bear it for his sake. Then there is that other part that jumps up and down and yells "but, but, but, OUCH!!"

I guess I'll nurse him this time and then decide what to do.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Nesting already?

I do have a track record of hitting the "nesting" phase of pregnancy far earlier than the baby actually wants to show up. But don't you think 10 weeks is a little early, even for me? ;)

For whatever reason, yesterday I felt wonderful. Well, still nauseous, but not tired. It was glorious! And seriously, it felt like nesting, because every few minutes I'd see something around the house and think "I could clean that up" or "That really needs to be organized better" or "That pile of junk needs to go" and instead of those thoughts resulting in many tears and gnashing of teeth, I just went and did it.

I didn't take any "before" pictures, because I wasn't thinking about it being a major project at the time. But it turned out so beautiful that I had to take pictures. And of course what else would I do with pictures of my beautifully organized home than put them on my blog so you can all be envious? ;)

The first area was the living room. We had angled one couch so that there was a sort of "catch-all" space behind it, and boy did it catch all. Unfortunately, because our couches are low, you could still see it all. Pretty much everything that I wished was in a closet but hadn't found space for was sitting in the corner of our living room for all the world to see. You can imagine how pretty that was.

In order to clear that space up, I also had to clear out the closet in Jonathan's bedroom. This is the closet that gets all the big stuff - the baby items we're not using (like swing, bathtub, boppy, carseat, etc.) and suitcases and sleeping bags and and and. Lots of big stuff in a small space.

The result of the two projects?

A truly stuffed, but organized closet:

And a nearly empty living room corner!

The second major area(s) were my pantries. I have two pantries - one in the cabinet under a hutch in the kitchen, and the other built into the coat closet. Both had gotten rather out of control and I was having trouble remembering what I had available, much less finding it when I wanted to cook! Now, however, I know exactly what I have and exactly where it is. I also have a list of things I need to restock. I'm looking forward to not having the frustration of being in the middle of cooking dinner, only to discover that, actually, I don't have that can of diced tomatoes after all!

Today's project is to clean up my cleaning supplies area. I know that sounds ironic, but it does seem to be awfully dirty. :)


Today is the first day this year that really feels like spring. The air is fresh and mildly warm, there is a friendly little breeze blowing, and a couple of birds are having a conversation in my backyard. It is the sort of day that makes you want to throw open all the windows and all the doors and welcome everyone and everything into your home. Except dirt. The boys tried very hard to bring the dirt in, but I decided that it was not quite so welcome.

We've been playing outside all morning - the boys have dug in the dirt and played with their ride-on trucks; I've hung laundry and swept and shaken rugs and mediated disputes about the ride-on trucks. Now Thomas is taking a nap and Jonathan is having a quiet time in his room; hence the time to blog. :)

Days like today remind me of how very much I like being a mom. I even found myself thinking "three won't be so hard!" this morning, and that is not a thought that has often crossed my mind recently. :) It is easy to lose sight of the big picture in the nauseous, exhausted fog that is early pregnancy. But even when I feel like puking, the fact is that I do like being a mom. I like playing with the boys and watching them play with each other. I like rocking Thomas to sleep and participating in Jonathan's very specific bedtime routine ("I'll kiss Mommy first, then Thomas, then Daddy.") I like giving them baths and enjoying their fearfully and wonderfully made bodies as they splash each other and giggle. I even like doing their laundry, particularly on days like today when hanging it out to dry is such a pleasure that I forget it is a chore.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

3rd time mommy humor

Amy sent me over to MommyLife to find this gem.

My favorite part:

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes.

Single parenting

That's what I'm doing this weekend. :)

Last month was pretty tough on Gabe. Because of early pregnancy scares and my bout with bronchitis, he has been on something like triple duty for way too long. He'd come home from work and take over with the kids, (or sometimes stay home with the kids and try to make up the work at naptimes and at night!) and make meals, and clean up the house, and whatever else needed to be done. All the while being sweet and encouraging to me - seriously, the man never complained. Sometimes I think I married a saint - and not just the "we're all saints in Christ" kind!

Anyway, now that I'm mostly normal again (as normal as you can be in early nauseous pregnancy!) and can handle kids and (some of) the house, it was a time for change. So I packed him off for a weekend away from family responsibilities. He didn't argue at all, which rather confirms my suspicion that he needed the break!

He's spending the weekend at a little bed and breakfast in Lake Arrowhead, and he called to tell me how beautiful it is. We just might go back there for an anniversary vacation. :)

Speaking of which - do you know we've been married nearly FIVE years??? Somehow that seems like a really, really long time. And yet not long at all. Sort of like how I feel like I'm still "just out of college" and yet I have 2+ children which sounds so much older.

The weekend here, as a single parent, is actually going better than I anticipated. Jonathan wasn't happy about his Daddy leaving last night, and acted up over dinner because of it. But we switched gears and had a bath for the hour leading up to bedtime (both boys LOVE baths) and things went smoothly after that. Today has gone well, too - I think because I planned it so carefully. I'm a woman with serious tricks up her sleeve. :)

We were going to go to church tomorrow in a borrowed car, but I just realized that we forgot to take the carseats out of our car before Gabe took it away. So much for that plan! If the weather cooperates maybe we'll go for a walk down to the shopping center and have lunch out or something. I think we'll all be slightly stir crazy if we don't get out somewhere. We were going to go for a walk today, but that plan changed due to rain. With luck it will be sunny tomorrow!

Even though it is harder to parent without Gabe here, and even though I miss him and miss being able to have a weekend together, I'm awfully glad that we could send him away. He's happy and enjoying his break, and well, I'm happy because he's happy.

I think maybe I've learned something in these nearly five years together. Because I'm not sure I could have happily sent him on his way a few years ago. And now I can send him off with a smile and an honest joy in his happiness. That's progress in the "don't be selfish" arena. Marriage does seem to help rub the rough edges off your character!

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Well THAT was fast!

I just put the first pair of pants in the "well that won't fit for awhile!" box. Didn't that happen awfully fast??? I remember being pregnant for the first time, with Jonathan - I didn't have to switch clothes until I was something like 16 weeks along. This time? 9 weeks. I did think all that time working out might have helped my stomach muscles hold out just a wee bit longer than that!

Still, it does make this little baby seem a bit more real - and that is exciting. :)


You won't be able to keep from laughing! Hat tip to Jackie at Stand Firm - thanks Jackie!

Well this is a disaster.

It is 12:15AM. I am awake. My children will be waking me up in approximately seven hours, if I'm lucky. This is not good.

This evening I had a rehearsal for the spring season of the Anglican Chorale. The rehearsal lasted until nearly 9:30pm, which is definitely past my bedtime right now! Since I still had a 45-60 minute drive home, I got a cup of coffee (not decaf) in the interest of staying awake and alive on the way home. Usually I don't drink caffeine (particularly while pregnant) but this time it seemed warranted. Plus, it normally only affects me very slightly.

Not tonight. I have no idea why, but this time I have ended up with an erratic (and uncomfortable) heartrate, and utterly sleepless. I lay in bed for half an hour, got up and made a loaf of bread for the morning, then lay in bed for another hour, heart racing, mind racing, trying not to move so that Gabe could sleep.

As you can see, I have now given up. I'll check my email, complain bitterly to the world at large, and go try again.

Sigh. I am going to feel awful in the morning.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Belated good stuff

I wrote this out a few weeks ago and forgot to post it. Christopher (my youngest brother) came here for a week to enjoy his nephews, and we enjoyed him! While he was here I jotted this down:

Christopher and Jonathan are in the kitchen, cleaning up after breakfast. Christopher is rinsing dishes and handing them to Jonathan to put into the dishwasher. And Jonathan is singing “we work together, we do it with cooperation, we are the body of Christ” from his Psalty cd. Does it get any better than this?

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

When it rains, it pours.

Actually, some real rain might improve this day considerably, as I rather like a good rainstorm.

So far today has included:

1 towed car
3 phone calls to figure out how to get the car back
185 dollars to get our car back
2 cranky children
1 mother with a stomach bug
20 million children's books read (to said cranky children)
1 novel that the mother would like to read instead
8 errands that should have been done (but can't be, lacking said car)

All things considered, perhaps I should go back to bed now and try again tomorrow!

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Childbearing years

I find it strange that it is considered perfectly acceptable to assume that if a woman of childbearing years claims to be ill, she must actually be pregnant. And that if you think it, you must of course ask her. Now, I'll allow that it may often be true and she may well be pregnant. But if she is, you've just put her in a difficult position. What if it is early and she doesn't want to talk about it? I'm not saying we should return to the days of confinements and never talking EVER about how the baby showed up...but a little privacy might be good, yes?

Having had multiple miscarriages, I find that I want a few weeks of privacy, just to make sure that the pregnancy will "stick". Because if it doesn't, and everyone knows about it, then I have to spend the next month fielding "oh, how are you?" questions. And in the aftermath of a lost pregnancy, even compassion is hard to handle gracefully.

This time everything seems to be going well. Yesterday we had an ultrasound that showed a healthy, properly developing baby. And so now we will share, with joy, the news that we are expecting baby #3 in September!

And for those of you who are thinking "ha, I just knew it!" I'd like to point out that bronchitis isn't generally part of early pregnancy. :)

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

First shoes

New shoes for our little walker, courtesy of his maternal grandparents. Thanks, Mom!

He thinks they're fun, but hasn't quite figured out actually walking in them yet. :)

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

One year old

Just over a year ago Thomas Nathanael joined our family.
Thomas, little bear, we love you.

Thursday, February 07, 2008

WFMW - online shopping edition

Yep, I'm still sick, so this is a really short post. But I couldn't resist posting a little something when I saw that today's (ok, yesterday's) WFMW is on the theme of online shopping. Because I have the best trick when it comes to online shopping:

Whenever I want to make a purchase online, I go there first and type in the name of the online store. Up pops a list of every available coupon code known to man, along with a percentage letting you know how often it has worked for people and comments about why it is or isn't working. More often than not I end up getting 15% off, or free shipping, or something like that. For about 30 seconds worth of work. Works for me!

For more good ideas, go visit Shannon's site. Just don't tell anyone that I sent you a day late. ;)

Also? I'm really, really sick. I think it is most likely the flu (the real one, with lots of respiratory ickiness) or pneumonia. If it isn't significantly better by tomorrow, I'm heading to the doctor. Prayer would be appreciated, not only for me but for my long-suffering husband who is trying to work, and take care of me, and take care of the (also sick) kids, and keep the house running. He's a good man, that one.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008


Boy am I ever. Some kind of respiratory infection with a horrible cough, a sore throat, and the "if a child needs me to open my eyes or get out of bed, I'm going to die" overall awfulness.

Thank God for caring friends. Tricia (a homeschooling mom of teenagers) came over for four hours today to take care of the children so I could sleep. This is probably the best gift I have ever received.

Also, my son is learning empathy. Sort of. This conversation happened this morning:

Jonathan: "Mommy, why are your eyes closed?"
Me: "Because my eyes hurt, because I am sick."
Jonathan: "Oh. I'm sorry. I can't do anything about that."

Sweet, isn't he? :)